Each viewing at the Funeral home in Jasper was packed to capacity. The funeral was tough especially for Nanny. Funerals are always tough to get through because we feel so bad for the friend or loved one we've lost. The truth is we are really feeling bad for ourselves. If you are of the Christian faith then the bible tells us not to be sad when a fellow believer passes on because they are with the Lord, a place we all hope to be someday. I held Nanny's hand while she wept and repeated the words "I did all I could, I tried to keep him here, I tried to save him."
As much as I love my grandmother I knew this simply wasn't true. Not that the cancer that took my grandpa hadn't spread to three major organs and that there was nothing anyone could do, that was true. Nanny couldn't have saved Pops because there is only one person who can truly save us, and that is the good Lord. So, Nanny could not have saved Pops, she could have only kept him alive. My father died when I was six years old and hardly a day goes by when I don't think of him. It will be 18 years this October since my dad went home, in some ways in seems every one of those 6,574 days and some ways it seems like the blink of an eye. Though I feel sad for myself, I would not bring him back for anything because that would be truly selfish. With all the pain and suffering in the world I feel more emotional for children just beginning their walk through life than I do for those who have slipped beyond the veil.
Pops always said him and me were just alike, easy going, we knew all the answers we were just waiting on the questions. Now my grandpa knows all the answers and all the questions. He sees the world the way we wish we could sometimes. The truth is I'm not sure any of us could handle it. Critics of Heaven and Christians claim that if Heaven is so great then why don't we kill ourselves to get there? I believe everyone has a job to do, and Pops did his and a few other people's jobs along the way. My life has yet to settle on its course yet, but I hope that mine will mean half as much as Pop's and my father's did. May they rest in peace.
III,
1 comment:
Honorable and biblical ... proud of you.
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