Ode to an Anonymous Commenter

I never post anonymous comments. I'm also not alone. Many other websites have recently opted for allowing comments only from people with Facebook accounts as a way of cutting down unnecessary/misinformed/racist or otherwise offensive posts. These posts are drastically more infrequent when posters are forced to provide their identity because it's very easy to be a trolling malcontent when you can hide behind a wall of secrecy and decidedly more difficult when your blindingly ignorant comments are available to family, friends and co-workers. I posted a blog recently expressing my views on foodies. Outlining my views on the subject of foodies and whether or not they actually exist. That was the sole focus of the blog that was nearly 650 words. I am posting this anonymous comment verbatim so we may all learn from it, and thus better ourselves.

"Hey, self-righteous d-bag! In your last sentence it should be the contraction 'they're' not the possessive 'their.' Maybe a rant about how Americans can't speak their (see what I did there?) own language? Dumbass." 

Let's examine this comment shall we? First, it upholds the first rule of anonymous commenting by opening with an insult. The warm embrace of anonymity allows any spineless idiot to feel ten feet tall and bullet-proof because "they'll never know it's me! ha ha ha!" It also ends with an insult because the commenter clearly doesn't feel confident they made their point. Of course, being an anonymous commenter means you're not really confident about anything other than your inner sexual desires towards your family members.

Removing the insults reveals the point of the readers comment. "In your last sentence it should be the contraction 'they're' not the possessive 'their.' Maybe a rant on how Americans can't speak their (see what I did there?) own language?" That would have been a relevant, reasonable and to-the-point comment to make, if say, my original post was about people with bad grammar/spelling ruining society or the internet. As I mentioned earlier, my original post was about foodies. 

I also used some form of they/they're/their/there/themselves a total of 26 times in my post all correctly save one time. That's a 96.2% correct grasp of the words. If you see a Facebook status that's a sentence or paragraph long, or a 140-character tweet and all the uses of their/they're/there are wrong, it would be clear the person was ignorant to the different meanings of the words. However, when the very last usage of the word in a 649 total word document that was 96.2% accurate overall and was posted around 2:00 am PST is wrong, I think it's safe to say it was a typo.

The bright side of moronic anonymous commenters is that when they take the time to post something completely irrelevant to the topic in such an abusive and juvenile manner, it ends up completely validating the point of the original article. After all, after reading my blog the only problem they could find was a simple grammatical error. That means they completely agree with me! Wahoo! Call me a self-righteous d-bag and a dumb ass (which is two words, see what I did there?) all you want but without providing any evidence to the contrary, you agree with me. Welcome to the fold, anonymous self-righteous d-bag!

It takes time and effort to write a post of any significant length and send it out for the world to survey and judge. I don't care whether people agree with what is said or not and I love when people have strong opinions because it means they actually believe in something. I also love arguing with people who can defend their beliefs because it means they've actually put some thought into their position instead of just agreeing with whatever they've been told. It also provides an opportunity for the most important part of an argument, listening to the other side and understanding where they're coming from.

The point I'm making is that I fully support comment sections as well as dialogue and debate in general because ideas and information should never be a one-way street. I also believe you sell yourself short by hiding from the world. Step out, be confident, believe what you want to believe but let the world know the real you. Otherwise, how will we ever appreciate you or your input? Imagine if the signers of the Declaration of Independence had all signed with an X?

So I fixed the error. The page is now 100%. Now there's nothing left to do but wait for the next anonymous reader to post an expletive laced comment on how pig-headed I am to insinuate my blog is anything close to the Declaration of Independence.

III,

The Myth of the Foodie

Foodies don't exist. Let's get that straight up front. Instead, there exists a certain group of people who have decided that they have nothing better to do with their spare time than convince other people that they "appreciate food." By "appreciate" of course, they mean "can afford" and by "food" they mean "expensive food." That's the point all foodies want you to realize right away. The fact that they're affluent enough to afford gourmet food. You never see foodies taking pictures or writing blogs about their experiences with mass-produced food, fast food or savoring the latest soup-kitchen fare. Even though the Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines foodie or foody or foo-gives-a-shit as "a person having an avid interest in the latest food fads." The latest food fads, if you've been paying attention, include turning everything that isn't food into food! (I think my favorite part of that last link is the fact that the McDonald's spokesman was named 'Todd Bacon') Where are the foodies lining up to compare and contrast the multitude of fast food offerings that contain various amounts of industrial food stuff? It is after all, a hot topic. One that will certainly affect the outlook of food industries from top-tier to third world countries.

Foodies are also under the impression that they have a special talent for liking food. That they, in secret, have discovered food that has been expertly prepared is "like ya know, good, man." Like they possess sommelier-like powers of taste that can, after biting into a $100 lamb chop, deduce the exact place, date and time a young sheep was put to death. Also, if any lamb relatives were present at the funeral and if they are also currently being served at a nearby table.

So what does it take to become a foodie you ask? Absolutely nothing. How many years must one train themselves before one can pass the foodie test and earn their Michelin stars? (don't bother reading that wiki review, you won't find foodie anywhere) None. Being a foodie is not a skill. Despite what lies they like to tell you, and more importantly themselves, anyone can call themselves a foodie and be just as qualified as any idiot walking down the street. That's right, The Burger King Kids Club has more restrictions than being a foodie has ever had.

All foodies suffer from the delusion that the reason they enjoy gourmet food and the huddled masses enjoy fast food is out of pure choice. They are completely blind to the fact that given the option of a free meal consisting of either their favorite cheap fast food or a four course meal of their choosing prepared by a four-star chef in a five-star restaurant, everyone chooses the fine dining and you don't have to be a food genius to figure it out. They completely ignore the only discernable requirement of being a so-called foodie, price, and spit in the faces of everyone forced to eat below their standards because they believe the ability to buy more expensive food somehow makes you appreciate it more.

You know who truly appreciates food? Homeless people and starving children.They appreciate food so much they beg for it, pray for it and even shed tears over being offered some soup and bread. That's food appreciation. That's putting your heart and soul into enjoying every meal like it's your last.

So go ahead foodies. Waste some people's weekly salary on food that's photogenic and takes an hour to prepare by blind monks flown in from parts unknown. Really, I mean that. Don't stop. I'd hate for all that time and effort and money to go to waste instead of being used to properly inflate the ego of a self-possessed egomaniac who's chosen to add to their own self worth the mundane ability to "appreciate" the one thing most Americans already take for granted because they've realized they're not special.

III,

Lincoln: A Review

Multiple : USA : Rated - PG13 : Running Time - 150 mins

This film, much like the eponymous main character, needs no introduction. It follows arguably the greatest American President, through his greatest achievements, during the last months of his life. One of the great American directors, assembled a cast of brilliant actors and made a film that was well...great.

The film takes a very close examination of the process surrounding the passage of the thirteenth amendment to the Constitution. We as an audience are the better for it, as we are introduced to a band of lesser known historical figures, all of which play important roles in their own right. The film truly triumphs by showcasing the political climate of the time and presenting arguments just as valid today as they were back then. Where many other films based on true events fail, (I'm looking at you Argo) by not creating enough tension for an outcome the audience is already aware of, Lincoln thrives by focusing on the impact the ultimate decision will have on the country as a whole as well as on a personal level with the individuals involved. Thus raising the stakes and providing more depth to the story.

The brilliance of the cast begins and ends with one man, Daniel Day-Lewis. He brings incredible humanity to a man who most of us have only experienced as a marble statue or quite possibly through Henry Fonda's performance in "Young Mr. Lincoln" (1939). In my opinion, Lewis should secure his third Oscar, placing him above all other males in history. Sally Field is a tenacious Mary Todd Lincoln and Tommy Lee Jones is a true force as Thaddeus Stevens, a fiery representative pushing for the abolition of slavery. David Strathairn makes yet another solid case for being the best supporting character actor of all time as Secretary of State William Seward. The backbone of the political gamesmanship comes from three characters played expertly by James Spader, John Hawkes and Tim Blake Nelson.

Lincoln is an entertaining history lesson, that showcases professional film making as well as acting.

Snobby Art House Rating - A

Les Miserables: A Review

Multiple : United Kingdom : Rated - PG13 : Running Time - 158 mins

Les Miserables is in the pantheon of most beloved musicals of all time. Adapted from Victor Hugo's epic 1862 novel of the same name, Les Miserables is as grand in scale on film as it is in volume of literature. The story is set in post-revolutionary France and centers around ex-prisoner Jean Valjean who, after serving his time and breaking parole, decides to reinvent himself and begin a new life while being obsessively pursued by Javert, a policeman determined to put him away for life. Valjean agrees to become caretaker to Cosette, the daughter of Fantine, a seamstress once under the employ of Valjean and subsequently forced onto the streets. Cosette grows up and falls in love with Marius, a young man deeply involved in the anti-monarchist movement currently gaining strength in the Parisian underground. Valjean must decide between protecting Cosette as he has sworn to do and allowing her to live her own life.

Tom Hooper, known previously for earning his Oscar for directing with 2010's "The King's Speech," should be commended for engineering a very bold attempt at capturing everything Les Miserables has to offer. Hooper's vision for revamping Les Mis was to have the actors sing live while acting, as opposed to traditional practices of having actors lip sync to music previously recorded in the studio. A change that would try and break down the wall between film and live stage performance. A change that also has a lot to do with the flaws of the film. In solo instances the performances can be very moving but in ensemble numbers the mix between live singing and recorded background becomes very muddled causing many of the lyrics to be missed. Secondly, the point of allowing the actors freedom to sing live provides them the advantage of having their acting influence the music not the other way around. This should make for a more captivating experience, however it is very rarely capitalized on and most scenes are so sweeping in scale, that the personal, stage-performance feel is lost.

The cast of Les Miserables truly define ensemble as the film is so evenly balanced with incredible talent. Hugh Jackman was born to play Jean Valjean and doesn't disappoint. Russell Crowe (Javert), despite harsh criticisms of his performance is not all that bad. It seems the role is more out of his vocal range and suffers more for that than his acting performance. Award show darling Anne Hathaway (Fantine), does an amazing job in this film, albeit for five minutes. If you are expecting a gripping, two hour, career defining performance, you will be disappointed. Amanda Seyfried (Cosette) and Eddie Redmayne (Marius) are quietly impressive and provide hope for the future of the acting landscape. While young Daniel Huttlestone is very entertaining as Gavroche, a rebellious little boy.

This brings me to my favorite parts of the film. Sacha Baron Cohen, Helena Bonham Carter and Samantha Barks. Cohen and Carter, dressed as though they just stepped out from a Tim Burton movie (God knows they probably were) and as if they were performing these roles in their spare time, absolutely steal this film. As Monsieur and Madame Thenardier, their "Master of the House" number is the highlight of the entire film. Samantha Barks making her motion picture debut, was astounding as Eponine, a role she played for the Les Miserable 25th Anniversary Concert. Her role provides incredible heart to a film that can be so overwhelming at times it glosses over its emotional core. In my opinion she gives the best singular performance of the film.

Les Miserables is an experience that can be captivating at times and very convoluted at others. In my opinion it will always be best enjoyed live on stage where the emotion can be felt more effectively and performances appreciated more accurately.

Snobby Art House Rating - B

Amour: A Review

Multiple : France/Germany/Austria : Rated - PG13 : Running Time - 127 mins

In 2009 director Michael Haneke won the Palme d'Or, the top prize given at the Cannes International Film Festival, for his film "The White Ribbon." He enjoyed the experience so much he won it again in 2012 becoming the first director in the history of the competition to claim two top prizes. His 2012 masterpiece is "Amour," a bare bones, examination of marital vows that is both beautiful and excruciating. The story surrounds Georges and his wife Anne, a retired couple living in France. After Anne suffers a physical malady, Georges is forced to care for her and the bond of husband and wife is truly tested.

This film sits like a weight on your chest from beginning to end. Haneke proves once again, to be a master of the foreboding atmosphere. You feel the confinement in every scene and all the aches and groans of physical agony seem to be personified in the creaks and moans of the apartment. In the film as in life, the release is a hurricane of emotions and only silence remains as the credits roll and we are free from Haneke's grip. 

Jean-Louis Trintignant plays Georges, the ever watchful and dutiful husband, who must tread a fine line between the wishes of his family, the concerns of the physicians and the dignity of his wife. He delivers a truly heartbreaking performance. Emmanuelle Riva's turn as Anne, is a masterwork of acting ability. Her journey from able-bodied partner to disabled patient is incredible.

Amour triumphs in its abilty to reach out to everyone who views it and touch them in some way. It inspires any number of reactions and stirs many more emotions. The pain it inflicts is not to be ignored, it is only the recognition of the overwhelming and universal power of love.

Snobby Art House Rating - A+

Django Unchained: A Review

The Weinstein Company : USA : Rated - R : Running Time - 165 mins

Django Unchained is the latest blood-soaked vengeance tale from writer/director Quentin Tarantino. It follows Django, a slave who sets out on a mission to free his wife Broomhilda after being liberated by the aptly named bounty hunter Dr. King Schultz. Schultz needs Django to identify a band of outlaw brothers that he has been unable to track down. In exchange for his help, Schultz promises to aid Django in his quest to find his wife. Django earns his freedom, receives training in the art of death, a new set of clothes and the two set off to free Broomhilda from the evil plantation owner Calvin Candie, dispatching their own brand of justice along the way.

True to form, Tarantino delivers another gritty melange of genre defining standards, infused with his own brand of edgy banter and doused in plenty of claret to satisfy even the most jaded of fan boys. An abundance of racial slurs and a Monty Python-esque caveat involving members of the Kyu Klux Klan will undoubtedly cause some viewer's skin to crawl with apprehension but not nearly as much as the scene with the dancing horse. (that is not a joke)

Christoph Waltz plays Dr. King Schultz and his cold-blooded, matter of fact attitude carries the film until Leonardo DiCaprio shows up. Jaime Foxx is serviceable as the leading man but is much better when he doesn't speak. DiCaprio continues to grow stronger with each passing role and turns in a truly menacing performance. Samuel L. Jackson plays "Stephen" a house slave who proves to be much more cunning and devious than he appears. Kerry Washington doesn't get enough screen time to make an impact on the film and serves only as the prize at the end of the journey.

Overall, Django Unchained is another quality addition to the Tarantino cannon.

Snobby Art House Rating - A-

Beasts of the Southern Wild: A Review

Fox Searchlight : USA : Rated - PG13 : Running Time - 93 mins

Beasts of the Southern Wild is the fantasy story of a little girl known as 'Hushpuppy' who is raised by her father 'Wink' in the Gulf of Mexico basin area of the southern United States known as "the bathtub." All seems well in her tiny community until Wink becomes sick and her world literally comes crashing down around her in the form of glaciers melting, sea levels rising and a massive storm. The storm also releases massive prehistoric "beasts" that have been trapped in the ice and they begin a film-long trek towards Hushpuppy and the other storm survivors. With their homes underwater, Wink, Hushpuppy and the small band of characters who call "the bathtub" home, attempt to rebuild their lives while avoiding starvation, disease and attempts from government officials to relocate them. Hushpuppy goes in search of her mother for answers and in the end must draw strength from her friends, neighbors and the sometimes harsh lessons her father used to raise her, in order to face the beasts of an uncertain future.

 Quvenzhane Wallis is spectacular as Hushpuppy, the fearless and curious main character. Most of the film's charm can be traced to Hushpuppy's childish interactions with the world around her. More than just benefiting from being an adorable little girl, Wallis at times delivers a performance that draws emotions from a wisdom well beyond her years.

Dwight Henry plays Wink, Hushpuppy's father, who is a combination of protector and foil. Everything that rings true about Wallis' performance would not be possible without her opposite Henry. Dwight Henry is the hidden gem of this movie. His portrayal of a father determined to raise his daughter with a tough, no-nonsense attitude while at times displaying the demeanor of an overgrown child himself is gripping. The small group of actors cast in the background are an authentic and colorful group who more than capably tie the film together.

Overall this is a great little film. It should be applauded for its simple yet powerful story telling. With very minimal effects and great performances from everyone involved from top to bottom it is very poetic and gives hope to every film maker who champions simple elegance over hollow, grandiose, big-budgeted blockbusters.

Snobby Art House Rating - A

ARGO: A Review

Warner Brothers : USA : Rated - R : Running Time - 120 mins


Argo tells the story of an actual CIA mission to rescue the six members of the U.S. embassy hiding out in Iran, who escaped when the embassy was overrun by Iranian nationalists in 1979. After vetting several options the government decides to send in a lone agent to bring them home, getting them out of the country by posing as a Canadian film crew scouting a location for the fake Hollywood blockbuster film "Argo." The mission is successful, end of story.

Unfortunately that is the feel of this movie, straight forward, no nonsense and also no real drama. The film is based on actual events and I believe it is very difficult to make a movie suspenseful when your audience already knows how the events play out. The best films that are based on true stories and still find a way to be impactful find other aspects of the events or the people involved and bring those to the forefront to parallel the actual events in the film. Argo, unfortunately, stays focused on the mission the entire time and presents it as being pulled off without many hiccups. The two main road blocks in the mission provide no real drama because we ultimately know the mission is a success.

Ben Affleck directs his third feature film and once again proves he is much better behind the camera. The film is quick, it doesn't drag and none of the 2-hours are wasted. Affleck also stars as Tony Mendez, a specialist in extraction, who develops the idea of a fake movie, pitches the plan to his government bosses, puts the plan into action with the help of make-up artist John Chambers (John Goodman) and producer Lester Siegel (Alan Arkin) and flies to Iran to execute the plan, all the while having the emotional range of old wall paper. It's just there, existing in the background, like it's supposed to. He gets no help from the actors playing the roles of the embassy employees, who we never get to really know on any level other than their characters constant complaining about being rescued. Alan Arkin and John Goodman steal this film. They provide the comedy relief with biting criticism of the current Hollywood environment.

Basically, Argo is an interesting story where the actual material might be just as entertaining if not more entertaining than a film based on that material. Alan Arkin deserves any and all recognition he gets, but overall the film underwhelms.

Snobby Art House Rating - B-

Don't Vote with Your Wallet

Tomorrow, American citizens with some form of government issued ID will vote for the next President. Not directly, but through the Electoral College consisting of 538 delegates (435 from the House Representatives, 100 Senators and 3 for the District of Columbia) and which has been outdated since the invention of television. A delegate pledges to vote for a certain candidate and the candidate who receives the most votes (270 or more) wins. Proponents of the Electoral College will argue that it allows for the smaller states not to be ruled by attitudes of bigger states but since the majority of votes comes from the House of Representatives and the number of representatives a state has is based on population, I find this a weak argument. Not to mention that there is currently no law that forces the electoral delegates to vote for the person they are pledged to vote for. So, when you cast your vote, there is nothing stopping the person you elected to vote for you from actually voting however they want.

This is a disturbing reality to grasp for anyone who believes in democracy and liberty and the whole "all men are created equal" thing. Wouldn't it make more sense for votes to count directly for the person being voted for and whoever has the most wins? It's hard convincing your friends and family to vote when they may not even get what they bargained for when trying to exercise one of the core freedoms our founding documents allow us to have.

It is easy to see how voters can become disillusioned about the Presidential election, with an awkward election process and an almost infinite sea of political jargon that is thrown at you up to two years in advance. By the time you step into the booth you've been told over and over how everything you believed about one candidate is wrong by another candidate whose own credibility has been destroyed by the other. The pros and cons of both start to meld together as the two candidates approach the actual election because they've come so far from the promises they made to their followers in the beginning that they are now just trying to say anything that anyone wants to hear. In that moment, the true enemy of freedom rears its ugly head. Apathy. That uncaring emotion that allows for all the B.S. reasons for voting to take control of your brain and allow you to rationalize voting for a particular candidate based on the flimsiest of excuses. This is how votes are wasted, this is how societal norms continue to constrain the minority of intelligent, forward thinking people in our country and how the political machine can continue rolling without any signs of changing, therefore subjecting another generation to the same apathetic tendencies.

If you haven't given up hope and decided to let the political machine eat you up, I believe there are a few pitfalls that you can navigate that would allow you to sift through the haze of political spin and allow you to vote and still look at yourself in the mirror in the morning with any ounce of sociological/philosophical respect. There are a lot of reasons to weigh when choosing who to vote for but I believe avoiding these reasons will allow you to focus on the other issues more clearly.

#1 Don't Vote with Your Wallet

Don't vote with your wallet. I know how it sounds, money to most people is the most important thing in the world, which is half the problem. Even if money doesn't completely rule your life most of you would probably argue that it's pretty damn important. From a day to day stand point you'll find little argument from me. However, when adjusting your world view to include an event that affects so many people like choosing the President, money begins to wain in importance when compared to war, civil rights and liberty. When you can realistically envision a scenario that includes the government telling you what career opportunities are available to you, who you can and cannot marry and what to do with your own body, the price of gas really doesn't matter much anymore. Human beings were here before money and we'll be here after money. If we all woke up tomorrow and decided that green paper rectangles didn't hold any value, they wouldn't. It's an illusion we've all agreed means something. That should show you the power of the human condition and just where money should fall on our list of things that actually matter. Women in this country, no matter how hard they work, are still being subjected to societal prejudices and are being restricted in their professional lives. They are being told that their bodies are not their own and someone else can decide what happens to it. It's hard to worry about the government taking money out of your wallet when their other hand is down your pants.

#2 Leave Your Religious Beliefs at Home

Leave your religious beliefs at home. This is another tough one but a very important issue that voters need to realize has absolutely no place in deciding who the president should be. Religion in some form is vital to our everyday lives but all religions aim to speak to you on a personal level. I don't think any rational person would argue that the founding fathers revolted against a country that had the power to religiously oppress them, in order to form another country where they religiously oppressed people. America is not a Christian nation, America is a nation that has a lot of Christians in it. Nearly all the founding fathers wrote papers on the subject of this country being a land of many faiths, despite their personal beliefs. Yet, most voters seem to think the election is some kind of holy war and the outcome of a certain faith taking control of the country depending on which faith you believe in, will surely usher in Armageddon. There are people in this country who do not have the freedom to live the life they want simply because the majority of people in power don't agree with  them. That's how small and irrational that argument really is. It goes against every single tenet this country stands for when you vote to take away the civil rights of another human being because your religion says something different. Our constitution guarantees every citizen the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. It doesn't say "only the white, straight, Christians," no matter how much some people want it to.

#3 Do Not Vote Based on Looks

I can't believe I actually have to print this one but unfortunately I have actually heard enough people in my everyday life try and rationally defend this argument. Usually this is the bottom of the barrel voter who has already succumbed to the Apathy Party. Looks can be deceiving. Talk to anyone who was actually alive during the time when most Americans lost faith in the political system, Watergate. Anyone not entirely cynical will tell you that they were absolutely shocked by it. Richard Nixon was a charming, never raise his voice much less swear, Quaker for God's sake, who pulled the rug out from an entire country. This is America, there are plenty of good looking people to choose from, not all of them should be given power. Not a single winner of the Miss USA Pageant has been a serious contender for the presidency and there are very good reasons for that. Sarah Palin was a beauty queen and also a weather girl before becoming the Governor of Alaska (kinda) and she was almost Vice President. By those standards Al Roker is a swimsuit contest away from having the qualifications to nuke Iran.

We the people, are allowing this to happen. We the people, have a responsibility to fight for freedom if not for the sake of political ideology, for the sake of humanity. Have we really come 236 years to give all of this up now? Have we really decided to turn in our sense of right and wrong we honestly had as children for ideas so petty as money, religion or looks? I truly hope not. I truly hope that we take a long look at which side wants freedom and which side wants to keep the machine running. It's up to us. It's always up to us.

III

Tomorrow Today

News flash. The newspaper industry is dying and with it, I fear, journalism. Less and less people are tuning into the local news and 24-hour news has taken over the way people view the world. America has progressed to the point where it is not enough to read about what happened, we have to get an alert when the future is happening now.

The heart and soul of publishing has always been writing, but its blood is advertising, especially in mass production. The massive cost for materials, printing and transportation began to outweigh the revenue from sales and instead of trying to up the cost of words on a page to John Q. Public the industry tapped into advertising. Renting their bodies and becoming a carrier for advertisers to now penetrate the homes of millions of consumers.

The problems started the moment the news left the printed page and jumped onto the glowing screens. The glowing screens sat in our houses, our offices and our laps. The glowing screens were everywhere. The news now came to us; we no longer had to go to the news. Also there was less garbage, less recycling, just less. That’s what America is, more for less, or in this case, less for less.

Advertising and cost are main concerns but I would argue that the real killer of print and ultimately journalism as a whole is the philosophical change America made from demanding quality reporting to get the whole truth, to sacrificing quality in order to get some truth as soon as possible. The real reason 24-hour news has become so popular is the networks ability to pass off speculation as news. Journalism happens in several stages and it is very rarely instantaneous. There is fact checking, source verification and the arranging of information so as not to be misleading or trivial. The reporting of news is only one step in the process of informing the public. Reporting the news takes up only a fraction of the time in a news program so 24-hour networks fill the extra time with analysis. The problem with this is that only a small amount of news needs to be analyzed passed its original reporting. This is where the real genius of hyper journalism comes into play, when a story is rushed through the journalistic process to the news floor the story comes in broken pieces instead of one fluid entity. This allows the anchors and “experts” to try and predict what direction the story will take.

The 24-hour networks then try and create news of their own by speculating on the events they have reported. Why waste time on a news show that only informs you of the past when there are programs creating a future for you, right in front of your eyes, that you can use to decide how to live and vote and think? This is where journalism will die. We as a people are so time consumed that we are moving closer and closer to the abandonment of fact altogether and the embrace of an educated guess. If we do not decide to hold our information gatekeepers responsible for dealing in fact instead of speculation and demand quality reporting today, then journalism has no future in the world of tomorrow. With no reliable source to aid in discovering the truth, we will have no choice but to accept what the gatekeepers present as important and will continue to be susceptible to fear mongering that is based on shallow premises and a complete and utter indifference towards information that would help create a society of intelligent well-informed individuals capable of thinking for themselves.

III,

Epic iFail: The Ballad of the Dust

"Since all life is futility, then the decision to exist must be the most irrational of all."

--Emile M. Cioran

Our story begins on a typical sunny day on the south side of Los Angeles. Blue skies, cool breeze, and the subtle suffocating fog of pollution made for an almost perfect day. Birds chirped, children laughed and the faint sound of sirens meant that somewhere the civil authorities were responding to a fire or a robbery. Even the tune of "pop goes the weasel" could be heard emanating from what was surely a pedophiliac ice cream truck. Yes all the signs were there, it was a typical day in L.A. So it seemed.

"Let's go." were the first words of the rest of the Dust's life. Little did the Dust know these two words would be the beginning of a trip into the very heart of futility in America. What began as a simple, if not routine, trip to the Apple Store for a new computer battery, would turn into a four hour marathon of unanswered questions and stifling bureaucratic red tape. The battery which allowed the Dust to enjoy the satisfying omnipotence of online tyranny had begun to diminish over time requiring a constant power supply and thus limiting the Dust's opportunities to provide his biting social commentary in a bold and what some would call "megalomania driven" attempt to rid the world of babies and meaningful relationships. "I'll drive" were the only words to be spoken by the Dust's dashingly hansom friend. The Pope was one of the Dust's oldest friends and one whose charm was only overshadowed by his striking good looks.

Exiting the vehicle the pair began walking to the store. The Pope thought back on his life and was still puzzled why the Dust had elected to travel to the Apple store for his new battery when one could have easily been purchased online. When the Pope, out of sheer benevolence, had offered this piece of most gracious information, the Dust launched into a tirade that usually followed any attempt to question his power or foresight. The Dust reminded the Pope of their respective place in the universe and at one point exclaimed "I am the law!" Once inside the store the Pope left the Dust to his own devices. After a few minutes of browsing, carousing and general merrymaking, including a slight security situation when just by simply requesting information on a set of headphones, no less than three female employees confessed their undying love for the Pope and had to be physically removed. When the Pope returned, he discovered the truth behind the Dust's insistence on traveling to the Apple store. In the previous weeks the Dust had talked often of increasing his influence to almost mythic proportions. Now he was in position to do so, by purchasing an iPhone. The iPhone would allow the Dust to be constantly plugged in to his online dominion. Now anywhere, anytime the Dust wished, he could crush the dreams of neophyte social comedians and cinematic artists while building a foundation to elevate himself into the realm of online supernova. His prowess would leave the likes of the Orwellian "Big Brother" in his wake while he spat in face of Zeus himself.

With the fate of humanity hanging in the balance of the Dust's bank account, which most scholars theorize to rival the Vatican, the transaction was suddenly cancelled. This news infuriated the Dust and he lashed out vociferously and cursed the gods at their pitiful attempt to quell his ascent. The gods were much cleverer than the Dust had anticipated and locked the Dust's fortune behind a firewall that could only be broken by the true Dust himself. "Fools!" exclaimed the Dust. "I will simply call the bank, inform them of the situation and all will be right with the world." The Dust reached into his pocket and produced his soon-to-be obsolete phone. Unbeknownst to the Dust, during the act of purchasing the iPhone, his old phone had been deactivated in preparation for him to embrace his destiny. His old phone was now a paperweight. "Well played..." was all the Dust could muster with a slight nod to the gods.

Fearing reprimand beyond comprehension the Pope offered his phone in assistance with the Dust's conundrum. When the business had been settled the two travelers returned inside only to find that the original employee had fled the scene. This was according to his replacement but the Pope couldn't help but wonder if the Dust had ritualistically killed the lowly employee behind his back. The new employee informed the Dust that there was such a place where all mistakes could be remedied. Where those inside had the power to right this injustice and restore to the Dust the glory that had fled him.

So the Pope and the Dust set off for the fabled AT&T store where, if the Apple employee was correct, they would find the answers the Dust was seeking. The Dust negotiated with the leaders of the AT&T and discovered that the curse of the pass-code was on his phone. Pass-codes were an ancient form of security handed down from the keepers of the funds to the elders of each family. The Dust now had to contact his mother to discover the hidden pass-code. Once again the path to immortality was wrought with turmoil and time-zones for by the time the Dust had reached his mother, it was too late to retrieve the pass-code. Too dangerous to be kept close at hand the pass-code had remained hidden from even the Dust's own mother and her and the family would be leaving for the land of Florida on the morrow and thus would be unable to assist the Dust in his time of need. In a feeble attempt to buy favor and pardon from the Dust, the leaders of the AT&T gave as a gift a useless SIM card. The Pope and the Dust returned to the Apple store but not until after the Dust had reduced the store to a smoldering pile of rubble.

Once back at the Apple store the Dust was informed of the true reality of the gods treachery. For without the pass-code he would be forever bound to his earthly phone and could not harness the power of the iPhone. Even the validity of his bank account had been called into question making the purchase of a computer battery impossible, and given the much more sobering situation with the phone, irrelevant.

So the Pope and the Dust traveled homeward. They had set out to purchase a computer battery and an iPhone but had only received a deactivated phone beyond repair instead. There are those who say the Dust's power diminished forever that day and that the gods laughed loudest and best. Still, there are those who shiver at the thought of the Dust's return. Indeed a legend has begun to grow of the Dust passing through the firewall of his bank account. That he himself harnessed the power of a newly created pass-code and is even now awaiting the arrival of the moment when he can grasp the iPhone in his hands and rise to power once again.

III,

Dynamite!

Barack Obama, the 44^th President of the United States, received the Nobel Peace Prize for 2009. The Nobel Peace Prize has been awarded 89 times to 119 Nobel Laureates between 1901 and 2008 – 96 times to individuals and 23 times to organizations. Since the International Committee of the Red Cross was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1917, 1944 and 1963, and the Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1954 and 1981, that means 96 individuals and 20 organizations have been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. Given to any other person at any other time and this is a cause for celebration. Only in America can the bestowing of an award meant to recognize the champions of hope and equality be met with derisiveness. The main argument being that President Obama hasn’t accomplished enough in his little over eight months as president. First of all, Barack Obama didn’t have to be president to be nominated for the award, so his accomplishments shouldn’t be confined to his presidency. Secondly, if by accomplished nothing you mean becoming the first minority candidate to be elected President of the United States, at the same time running on a platform of open discussion with all nations both friend and foe, political and ideological differences aside. The award was given to Barack Obama the man, not Barack Obama the President.

The Nobel Peace Prize (NPP) is different from other awards in the Nobel confluence of honors. It’s the only award that takes both the physical body of work as well as the intentional body of work equally into account. Not to say that the body of work and research performed by the laureates in other areas (physics, chemistry, medicine or physiology, literature and economics) won’t have an impact on future generations but these are areas of study where the bulk of the results are tangible. Peace, even when pursued by the most ardent of searchers, remains a constantly fleeting idea, and therefore the concept of peace must be reexamined and reaffirmed. So almost as important as the works themselves is the inspiration and hope that is fostered. The prize has been awarded to individuals as well as organizations such as International Physicians for the Prevention of Nuclear War, Amnesty International, International Labour Organization and the United Nations. Primarily based on their actions but also in recognition of the mere existence of their work, the fact that in the given times there is an entity willing to serve the harmony of the world whether anyone is listening or not.

In 1994 the NPP was awarded to Yasser Arafat, Shimon Peres and Yitzhak Rabin. These men are not exactly the leaders of a region known for amicable games of checkers let alone peace. The reason they received the award was because of their participation in the Oslo Accords, at the time a ground breaking effort to form an understanding between Israelis and Palestinians because the two sides were at least speaking in the same room to each other, but hindsight being what it is, the accord has had little to no effect on the stability of the region. Since then, Rabin was assassinated in 1995, Arafat never adhered to ceasefire protocol or realistically attempted to control the radical factions of the PLO and Peres was quoted recently reminding Iran that "it could be wiped off the map," this from a NPP laureate. Basically the award was given in promotion of the idea of peace in the Middle East, a Pavlovian reinforced behavior modification on an international scale. So, the concept of using the award as a reassuring slap on the back instead of a celebration of accomplished works is nothing new.

What I don't understand is the disdain and in some cases acrimony towards this man for receiving an honor, which some people don't believe he deserves simply because of a difference in policy, this being America after all. Any American should be proud that the elected leader of our country has, arguably, by his mere position, demeanor, and ideology impacted the view of the international community towards America in a positive way, especially in light of events in the past decade. The only way this country, or any country for that matter, will survive is through active cooperation with the other nations of the globe. Any attempt to cross social, political, economic and religious boundaries in an attempt to unite the world against the problems facing all of humanity not just individual countries should be acknowledged and supported. Hunger, fear, climate-control and social equality have no political affiliation or agenda. It will take everyone working together and communicating in peace.

III,

(Source: http://nobelprize.org/nobel_prizes/peace/laureates/)

The Death of Country Music

This post is a little out of the ordinary but it's also been a long time coming. Its roots are in a discussion I had with a friend of mine about different genres of music. I started talking about some of my favorite musicians and my friend was surprised to find that a number of them were country stars. I don't mind country music. My early years were dominated by country music which is a blessing because it was the last time country music was any good.

When I began to articulate just why I deviated from the country path I found that the void of country music in my life was primarily the result of no true country music existing anymore. The country music fans of today are really fans of "Pop-country" a mixture of violins and guitars and belt-buckles and cowboy hats with twanged out pop and R&B. Basically club music sung by platinum blonds or boy bands with electric banjos.

If it can be said Rock n' Roll achieved perfection in 1974 then I propose the death of country music occurred in 1995. Country music transitioned through many phases over the years but the basis for the country music of today enjoyed just five short years of perfection 1989-1994. After 1994 people entered the realm of country music and events were set in motion that would bring about the end of the Nashville sound. Consider: Garth Brooks was the first country music rock star and his success directly influenced the new generation of people who saw that country musicians could have the kind of success that many thought only existed in the rock star stratosphere. "In Pieces" was released in 1994 and was the last great album from Garth Brooks who began touring in Europe after the overseas success of the album. Everything changed after that.

1995 – Shania Twain scores first top 10 hit “Any Man of Mine” off her “The Woman in Me” album. Shania’s success leads her to follow up with the album “Come on Over” off of which the song “I Feel Like a Woman” led her to mega-stardom and Pop-Country was born. By 1998, Twain was on the first installment of VH1’s Divas with Celine Dion, Mariah Carey, Gloria Estefan and Aretha Franklin.

1995 – The group “Lonestar” debuts on the Billboard Charts. Lonestar would later explode with crossover pop hit “Amazed.” Directly contributing to the success of such pop-country bands as Nickel Creek and Rascal Flatts by laying the ground work in both look and sound. Lonestar also fired original bass guitar player John Rich who after a failed solo career teamed with Big Kenny to form Big & Rich and create hip-hop country.

1995 – Faith Hill’s album “It Matters to Me” is delayed after she has surgery on her vocal chords. Later that same year she agrees to tour the following year with Tim McGraw. Hill breaks off a former engagement with her manager to date McGraw who had also recently broken off an engagement. The two are married on October 6, 1996. Hill then takes a three-year hiatus and records “It’s Your Love” with McGraw. Hill returns after record success with her duet with McGraw and focuses all of her energy on love songs, abandoning the somber and soulful melodies of "It Matters to Me." The duo strangleholds county music with their love albums for years.

After 1995 the entire landscape of the genre changed but hopefully with the advancements in personal recording and the increasing popularity of finding unknown artists on the rise the focus will come out of the lime light and recording studios and into the hearts of the songwriters and just maybe we can find our way back to Memphis.

One Night Stand-Up

On July 13th 2009 at approximately 7:45 pm. I stepped onto the open stage at the Comedy Store on Sunset Blvd. in Los Angeles California. The bright lights blotting out the front row, I was alone on stage. I was also alone in the club save for my fellow amateur comedians. The Pot Luck shows at the Comedy Store are a tradition that date back to the earliest days of the store. Alumni that have gone on to stardom after paying their dues at the open mic include Richard Pryor, Sam Kinison, David Letterman and more.

The evening begins when the sign-up sheet appears in front of the store at 6:00 pm. Up to 40 aspiring comedians can sign up for 15 to 20, three-minute performance spots. After seven weeks of not making the cut Bobby Pope appeared in spot #12. It was a slow night at the club, a total of four people were in the audience and not at the same time. Technically three people were audience members and one was a comedian sitting with a friend. So the fanfare was nowhere and the crowd a little brutal but the show went on.

The performers were gracious to each other and the night became a proving ground for new material. Not a bad situation to be in when performing for the first time. It was a walk through for hopefully many attempts to come. My three minutes went by without incident, there were some definite hits and some misses and I was able to end on a laugh. In the end the sting of the stage is as strong as ever. I am a person who thrives in the spotlight. A full house may mean more pressure but you also get a more accurate barometer of how well you perform. Some questions were left unanswered but the experience I will always have.

Joke that got the biggest laugh - "So I was shocked to find that in L.A. you can buy hard liquor at the drug store. You can walk into CVS and buy enough Vodka and Tylenol P.M. to recreate Liza Minelli's honeymoon."

III,

Six Months in L.A.

Six months ago I pulled onto Hobart Blvd with my roommate and the Penske moving van we had rented and gazed upon the apartment that would be our new home. 30 seconds later a car crash occurred in the intersection we were just in, somehow almost punctuating the cross country journey we had taken with a final thud. The beautiful country we passed through from the lowlands of the south to the plains of the southwest finally across the desert had given way to the vast expanse of the city, and smashed against the reality of the situation. We were there.

The basics came slowly but surely, television, phone line, internet. The intangibles still up for grabs, interviews, auditions, school, careers. In between there was life. Since I've been here I've experienced three earthquakes, only one of which I have actually felt. I spent St. Patrick's Day at the roof top bar of a very nice hotel that I would normally not be allowed in. The Lakers won the NBA championship with rioting and fire. The 4th of July celebrations with barbecues and fire. Tragically the death of Michael Jackson and the year is only half over.

The time has gone by very rapidly. I remember being shocked that I had been in L.A. for two months and now college football season is only two months away. I have seen the Rose bowl and the Coliseum, been to Dodger stadium and Angel stadium in Anaheim but was turned away because the game was sold out. My first friend from Georgia ventured west for a week in May and we astonished ourselves by seeing all the sights it took a week to see last year, in a day. My roommates involvement with USC and also his attention to 7-11 online giveaways has made it possible to see several movies in advance and also for free. Some times these are great and sometimes they make me regret ever giving money Transformers 2. I have played volleyball on the beach and also enjoyed the simple but fantastic pleasure that is In N' Out Burger.

The career path has been exciting and frustrating at the same time. I have been able to be my own person and people seem to appreciate that more here than I have ever encountered. The downside is waiting for the opportunities. In a place where individuality is celebrated, you are evaluated, individually, which can take some time in the constant search for "it" whatever "it" is. I'm not sure I ever want to be "it" but I believe it takes a little bit of "it" to become free to create. I remain optimistic that something will happen very soon because for the first time in a while all of my bases are covered. The rest will hopefully be history, I just need to continue to try and not be bogged down by self doubt.

Hopefully the next six months will be just as exciting and rewarding as the previous six as new obstacles and challenges arise but new friends and experiences will be discovered. The life we have on this planet is only ours for a short time and to strive to be ordinary and take the easy beaten path is to truly miss out on what makes life worthwhile.

III,

Stallworthless

How much is the life of a human worth? Have you ever considered what the price of your life would be? What about a loved one? Does the price vary considering how long the person has been alive or what they did while alive? Do you think the very question is repulsive? If you do you're definitely not alone. The hard truth is that the law allows for that very question to be realized.

I am from Georgia originally, I moved to L.A. in 2009 about a year and a half removed from one of, if not the biggest, sports scandal in Atlanta history. Michael Vick, star quarterback for the Falcons had been convicted of operating or knowing of an operation of dog fighting on his property in his home state of Virginia. Michael Vick received 23 months in prison with the last three months being house arrested, he is scheduled to complete his sentence on July 20th. This trial split Atlanta down the middle. I was working for a local sports radio station at the time and went to several Falcons games that season. The city was a mix of outrage and utter indifference. One side viewed the situation as just another punk athlete getting too big for himself and paying the consequences. The other side viewed this as an act of justice strengthened by special interest groups persecuting a man for a victimless crime. The main portion of the argument was whether or not the sentence fit the crime. Measured against other crimes, how did this sentence for the deaths of animals measure with other major crimes of drug/weapon possession or assault/murder. I was originally on the side of "Vick got what he deserved," until recently.

Cleveland Browns wide receiver Donte Stallworth was driving drunk on March 14 in Florida when he struck and killed a pedestrian. Charged and convicted of DUI manslaughter.

Pretty hefty terms in the judicial world. Stallworth's sentence you ask? If a man was given 23 months in prison for the violent death of innocent animals then the DUI slaying of an innocent man must be life without parole. Wrong. For murdering an innocent man Stallworth received 30 DAYS in prison. How does something like this happen in a country that prides itself on Liberty and Justice? Here's the important part, Stallworth reached a "confidential" cash settlement with the relatives of the victim. Until this moment, all of the arguments and complaining about Michael Vick getting a rough treatment over some dogs went in one ear and out the other for me. Most of these people, I told my self very self righteously, were just exalting the game of football over what was right and they were more upset at the loss of a quarterback than seeing justice done. Now, I have to admit they may have a point.

So the question was raised again. How much does a human life cost? How misguided are the priorities of America that we place so much emphasis on buying power that the common belief is that green purchasing squares can buy happiness or in some cases replace a loved one? 30 days for killing a human being. That's the bottom line, forget the arrogance of offering anything but condolences and apologies to the family especially trying to buy their pain. "I feel bad but, um, I really wanna play football so, would you take this money so I can go do that." That's is all Stallworth's fault. The family actually accepting the money, is society's fault.

Let's compare Michael Vick's 23 months with some other sports crimes.

1998 - Leonard Little, NFL St. Louis Rams. Drives drunk and kills a wife and mother. 90 days in prison.

2000 - Ray Lewis, NFL Baltimore Ravens. Was charged with, a later acquitted of manslaughter of two men after several witnesses recanted their testimony. Lewis plead guilty to obstruction of justice and testified against two people he was in the same limo with, and originally tried to protect. He never spent a day in jail.

2004 - Jamaal Lewis, NFL Ravens/Browns. Was charged with conspiring to possess and distribute a copious amount of cocaine. Spent 4 months in prison.

That's in the old U.S. of A. Let's compare that to a case from Venezuela. MLB relief pitcher Ugueth Urbina was arrested for the attempted murder of five people. Long story short, Urbina attacked five farmers on his property in Venezuela with a machete and gasoline and no one was killed. Urbina received 14 YEARS in prison and his professional baseball career is over.

You kill, or even try to kill, somebody anywhere else in the world and they put you in a place where you can't do that anymore and they throw away the key. Here, we ask if you would like to donate to the empty hole left in your victim's families. We slap your hand and say shame on you but don't worry we'll have you back in time for the big game. That is of course unless you hurt an animal. Hurt an animal and we'll call you an animal. Put you in a cage and make you respect animals. Hurt a human and you get treated humanely. I guess we'll just have to wait until animals learn to care about money, then we can buy them off too.

III,

In Memoriam

Wilson Eugene Anderson (Pops) was my grandfather on my mother's side. He passed away recently and he was without a doubt the coolest, slickest and most honest person I have ever known. A veteran of the War in Korea he returned home to Dawsonville, GA where he married my grandma Annette Crane. (Nanny) They moved to Jasper, GA where Nanny and Pops lived happily married for 53 years. Raising my mom (Jackie) and my aunt Hayley, Nanny stayed home while Pops worked for the Ford motor company in Atlanta before retiring to be a farmer. In his younger years, Pops and his friends and family may or may not have ran moonshine, the jury is still out.

Each viewing at the Funeral home in Jasper was packed to capacity. The funeral was tough especially for Nanny. Funerals are always tough to get through because we feel so bad for the friend or loved one we've lost. The truth is we are really feeling bad for ourselves. If you are of the Christian faith then the bible tells us not to be sad when a fellow believer passes on because they are with the Lord, a place we all hope to be someday. I held Nanny's hand while she wept and repeated the words "I did all I could, I tried to keep him here, I tried to save him."

As much as I love my grandmother I knew this simply wasn't true. Not that the cancer that took my grandpa hadn't spread to three major organs and that there was nothing anyone could do, that was true. Nanny couldn't have saved Pops because there is only one person who can truly save us, and that is the good Lord. So, Nanny could not have saved Pops, she could have only kept him alive. My father died when I was six years old and hardly a day goes by when I don't think of him. It will be 18 years this October since my dad went home, in some ways in seems every one of those 6,574 days and some ways it seems like the blink of an eye. Though I feel sad for myself, I would not bring him back for anything because that would be truly selfish. With all the pain and suffering in the world I feel more emotional for children just beginning their walk through life than I do for those who have slipped beyond the veil.

Pops always said him and me were just alike, easy going, we knew all the answers we were just waiting on the questions. Now my grandpa knows all the answers and all the questions. He sees the world the way we wish we could sometimes. The truth is I'm not sure any of us could handle it. Critics of Heaven and Christians claim that if Heaven is so great then why don't we kill ourselves to get there? I believe everyone has a job to do, and Pops did his and a few other people's jobs along the way. My life has yet to settle on its course yet, but I hope that mine will mean half as much as Pop's and my father's did. May they rest in peace.

III,

Shredded Tweet

So, I have a problem. I find myself faced with an uncontrollable need to let my friends, family and co-workers know exactly what I'm up to all the time. I mean sometimes I'll just be walking along and I'll think of something really ironic about my t-shirt or the fact that I think stickers could save the economy or maybe just feel the need to quote a random song that makes people wonder what's really going on under my skin in this crazy mixed up world. But alas, I guess I'll have to settle with updating my Facebook status whenever I'm around my computer, laptop or cell phone. Oh if there was only a place I could go on the Internet that was accessible from my computer, laptop and cell phone that allowed me to post my inner thoughts, fears, song lyrics, mindless ramblings, comments on the weather and uneducated misinformed theories on deeply social and philosophical ideas. I don't want to deal with profile information, photos, videos or invites to social and political events, no, I just want to tell people what I'm thinking right now or they'll never truly understand or accept me. 

Ladies and gentlemen, there is such a place in cyberspace. A place where self-indulged celebrities and self-indulged joe somebodies alike can post messages to anyone who has nothing else to do but be spoon fed quips from people they know or wish they knew. The amorphous blob that is devouring the consciousness of America and the ultimate downfall of privacy and originality is Twitter.

The fundamental problem I have with Twitter is who cares? Do you really think your friends need to know what you watched on television last night? Another question I have is when did we develop this desire to let people into our lives on a moment by moment basis? Has reality TV invaded so much of our culture that even when no one respects reality TV we all have this secret desire to be "on" all the time? Do we really feel the need to behave like cameras and microphones are constantly rolling waiting to capture that "gem" of wit or social humor? Sadly, that would almost be acceptable, if Twitter was a place for the exchange of social and cultural witticisms and cynicisms between people of all classes and walks of life. It is not however, instead it is a place for people who get upset at the prospect of the government wiretapping and violating their right of privacy, spray painting their every mundane utterance all over one of the most non secure forums outside of a bulletin board in a frat house, the Internet. 

Finally, the introduction of celebrities into the fray of the masses. The art of "Buzz Marketing" strikes again. Buzz marketing was invented by companies who were too tired of creating something original for the consuming public that they advised a way to poll the populace to try and figure out what alternative, non-mainstream, fad, consumers were interested in. Then, the big companies would either 1) buy out the fad or 2) create their own knock-off polished commercialized version. All of this in an attempt to remain relevant. As enticing as the allure is of "following" (never mind the stalker lingo) a celebrity on Twitter to see what makes them tick, the truth behind why they have allowed themselves to be viewed in this forum is lost. Celebrities have to keep you interested in their lives because that's how most of them make money. When celebrities "tweet" they are reminding you that they are still out there (as if we didn't know) and not to forget how funny and candid, or eccentric the parts of their lives they shared with you are, the next time they have a project up for sale. 

So the next time you think of something culturally relevant to say, or have a moment of clarity in this ever increasingly serious world, save it. Get together with your friends in a social space (not Myspace) for some non-Facebook, face time and exchange ideas the old fashioned way, with good conversation. Take the time to formulate an opinion or cultivate a philosophy before splattering it for all the world to see. Realize that maybe not everyone should be privy to your whereabouts at all times. And finally, come to terms with your own self worth, be your own person, and not a mindless Twit.

Savannah Sorrow

Everybody dreams. Dreams are apart of life. Famed Austrian psychiatrist Sigmund Freud researched dreams with his work on the unconscious mind. One theory proposed dreams to be the residue of thoughts that accumulate during the day and slowly make their way into the forefront when the mind is restless. Dreams are believed to be windows into our personalities and psyches. We seek to know the meaning of dreams and why certain dreams occur. Dreaming is sometimes credited as an important step in visualization, if you dream of success you will be more likely to achieve success. As kids we are told to dream big but not to daydream in class, or pursue pipe dreams. Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream of peace for the future, for society and for humanity.

I had a dream. 

My dream was not grand in nature. I didn't want fame or fortune or cultural significance, no. All I wanted was a date. One date. One measly evening out with good food and good conversation and maybe even a good-night kiss, I'm not picky. But no. Not me. For my dream died a slow painful death. On the eastern side of the state of Georgia, by the shores of the Atlantic ocean, Mandy Moore secretly married boyfriend Ryan Adams in Savannah. 

The dream is gone. The wish has vanished. I moved to the other side of the country, L.A., Hollywood, the number one place to run into celebrities and Mandy Moore gets married in my home state! If I believed in signs, this would be a big one. Of course the real victim in all of this is the list. Everyone has a list and it tragically dies, slowly but surely as you get older and become more tied down with responsibility and family. Whether this list contains just women and or men or as mine does, a list of situations, time proves the ultimate victor. 

Mandy Moore became an infatuation of mine when I was a teenager. In the time of Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera, Mandy Moore didn't achieve the musical prowess of Christina or the pop cultural exposure of Spears. She also never transformed her identity. This is the allure of Ms. Moore, er uh, Mrs. Adams. (It even hurts to type) Mandy has remained her dignified self when other young starlets have made headlines for less flattering forms of self-humiliation. 

As I stand, prepared to erase her from my list, I know it will be more difficult to erase her from my mind, my heart and my dreams.

III,

Oscar Night in L.A.

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences held the 81st Academy Awards this past Sunday, February 22nd. I am a huge film fanatic and consider myself a bit of a film geek. Hugh Jackman hosted for the first time and being a natural born performer he did very well. The show decided to change its format which was a good thing after so many years. Not all the changes will stick around but I hope one in particular will. The awards for best actor and actress in both the leading and supporting categories were presented by five award winners from previous years. Each previous winner introduced and explained a little bit about the nominee they were representing. 

The show also stuck to its basic principal of excluding blockbusters from the major awards. I will be the first person to stand up and say that I would rather see an independent passion project with a smaller budget than another cookie cutter, dumbed down, action flick. The point remains that good film making isn't restricted to dramas or the flavor of the multicultural week. Two films unjustly prejudiced against were The Dark Knight, as well as Chris Nolan not receiving a best director nod, and Wall-E. Having not seen Wall-E I can't fully speak on it's behalf but I have heard from reliable sources that it is more than just another Pixar triumph and addresses the human condition in an open and frank way. The Dark Knight was a great film. If you take away the mask and the costumes The Dark Knight is a great crime film regardless of the superhero aspect. The direction is good, the score (another gyp) is amazing and the acting by all involved serves some really great performances. When will the academy learn that budget and subject matter do not always predict good content or process?

After having been outside the Shrine Theatre for the S.A.G. Awards and being able to see the red carpet and even a few A-listers, I was really excited about the prospect of staking out the Kodak Theatre for the Oscars. Alas, duty called and I helped The Dust work on his first project of film school and thus missed the red carpet.

After enjoying the show I learned something that changed my view on missing out on the red carpet. As it turns out, representatives from the infamous Westboro Baptist Church (WBC) from Topeka Kansas were picketing the event on the corner of Sunset and Highland. WBC makes it their duty to picket the funerals of homosexuals who have died as a result of hate-crimes or the AIDS virus. At a time of celebration these people held signs depicting Heath Ledger and the words "Heath in Hell." They also held signs depicting president Obama as Satan and signs reading "God Hates America." The church has also taken to protesting the funerals of soldiers from Iraq. On the official website the church claims the reason soldiers joined the military was because "they are lazy, incompetent idiots." The church has picketed the funeral of Fred "Mr." Rodgers, Coretta Scott King and Jerry Falwell. It is important to note that WBC is not officially linked with any baptist convention or organization.

Everyday it still amazes me that we live in a country that is so proud of its freedom and society and yet we still turn a blind eye to those who are not free. We celebrate our freedom of speech but are often quick to condemn anyone who speaks their mind. We celebrate our freedom of religion but anyone who does not believe exactly as we do are considered evil and wrong. Only in a country as free as ours can a person defend their "rights" one day and do all they can to restrict the "rights" of others the next. The ultimate hypocrisy in this country is our egotistical sense of the freedom to be right, even if only in our own minds, no matter what. 

I am a christian man. I believe in the bible and the lord Jesus. I believe that the most misunderstood person in history was Jesus. A life and a message so simple and so profound that has been more misinterpreted by so many I cannot think of. I have many christian friends that cannot believe the state of the world. They are shocked day by day at the horrors of our society. They wonder in amazement how so many people disregard Christianity. To this I say look no further than WBC. How can we hope to live in peace and spread the word of love when there are so many spreading the word of hate in His name. 

I saw an advance screening of the documentary film "Religulous" by HBO political commentator Bill Maher. The film was touted for asking the tough questions many religious people today aren't willing to answer. The film really focuses on Bill's own fear of people who don't care whether they live or die because of their beliefs, making decisions that effect people who do care whether they live or die. I went to this film for the same reason many religious people did not, I wanted to hear these questions. What I saw was a well formatted series of ultimate questions intended to make even the most ardent theological scholar slip up. Though I came out of the film confident that upon opportunity I could very easily explain the majority of the questions posed, I was discouraged at the sheer blindness and unwillingness to participate in discussion by many religious people. This was the brass ring for believers, this was a chance to stand up confidently and passionately and explain the fundamentals of our faith for the dominantly non-religious audience. Yet they were no where to be found. Only regurgitated slogans and scriptures that have no meaning to people who don't have a base in the faith. 

I'm not in favor of abandoning religious beliefs or compromising what you believe to be right but the point is that we are instructed to lead by example. We cannot force anyone to believe as we do just as we would not want to be forced to believe anything we didn't agree with. All of us, religious and not have got to realize that we are all in this world together. We cannot call ourselves the land of the free if we continue to restrict the freedom of others.